I'm currently going through a challenge crisis. My situation may be different than most, or maybe not. I am an older returning college student who decided to return to school after working as a paralegal for 8 1/2 years. I've been married to my husband for 13 years and have a 12 year old daughter and 7 year old son. I will graduate with my BA in Speech-Language Pathology in May 2016. I recently told my husband that I was thinking of applying for the graduate program in student affairs here at NAU immediately after graduating. I didn't get the reaction I wanted. I can see where he is coming from and know it has been difficult on him as being the sole provider. He is anxious for us to become a two-income household again. By getting involved on campus it has sparked this new interest in me of working in student affairs. It is something I would volunteer to do if I never had to work a day for the rest of my life. I have never felt so passionate about anything else. I don't know if I could call this a positive or negative experience. If I call it positive am I being selfish. If I call it negative is it because I am not happy about having to give up on a dream so I can seek employment and help provide for my family. I don't know? Luckily, I still have time to come up with a solution. This is something I really want to do! How can I make this happen?
Using this experience as something helpful when facing a challenging conversation with a mentee would definitely be a test for me. Of course their situation may not be exactly like mine but I can see some relate-able issues that could come up. Maybe my mentee wants to change their major to one that their parents don't agree with or maybe they are here and they feel guilty because of the financial burden it is putting on their family. The best positive advice I could give them is to ask them to put everyone and everything else aside ask them, "what is it that they want to do and how much do they want to be here?" Once I get that answer (hopefully a yes, they want to be here and pursue their college degree) I would say okay let's take it from there. I would help research careers that they can show their parents are available for the major they want. I would help by researching scholarships, grants, and finding a job on campus to help with the financial aspect.
Vidal,
ReplyDeleteI don't believe an experience has to be positive or negative, it can be both. Not that I know about or have the experience of a married relationship, I feel as though its something you should do! Maybe its just the selfish part of me saying that... regardless, it would be an amazing thing for you to take part of. I can see your passion through the words in this post. You only live this life once, and if your heart is into it, why would you pass up the opportunity? My mom might be pissed at something I choose to do, but at the end of the day she loves me, and were family.
Aside from my two cents (lol), I think your situation is very relatable. It's true, most students wont have this exact challenge in their lives, but as you said it can be translated into different situations. Thank you for sharing!
Thanks Chelsea!!!
ReplyDeleteVidal,
ReplyDeleteI really love how you kinda bring a different perspective about challenges that we face. I think I can generalize and say that most of us are not married and have children, but we can still learn from your experience and take advice from it. No matter what situation it may be, it does sting a little bit when the people you love are not onboard with the things that you want in your life. Your students won't be dealing with the exact same challenges as you, but everyone has to make big life decisions at some point and you can use your current experience as a great example!
Vidal,
ReplyDeleteYou have a very unique situation that is very empowering and motivating for others and for mentees. I think that it is really cool that you decided that you didnt want to be a paralegal anymore and decided to attend college in a different career and now want to do the graduate program. It shows that it doesn't matter where you are in your life and how old you are, you have the power to do whatever you want to do. Just like the advice that you gave to your potential mentees about not letting their parents decide their future, the same thing for you, If you want to be a part of the graduate program, I think you should regardless of the challenges you will make. Every experience and story has it's challenges but that is just a part of life.